There are many differnt ways of phrasing the ride as you have said. Tony plays with a more dotted feel, while Elvin will accent the last triple heavily, others will lean on the quater note and treat the skip notes ppp.
There really is no rule as all drummers will interpret the swing pattern differently as you have pointed out - also check out Blakey, Philly Jo, Paul Motion, Erskoman, Mel Lewis, Lewis Nash, etc etc etc. I would say that as long as you have a driving, solid crotchet feel you are along the right lines, the skip notes can be phrased as the music dictates.
Don't forget that when you play 'in two', you don't want a driving pulse as the time is more broken - here the skip note is accented until the bass starts to walk and a more driving four feel happens.
Hope this helps
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